What Kind of Zookeeper Would You Be?

Now hiring: zookeeper, full time, early starts. Requirements include a strong back, a good sense of smell you're willing to lose, and the ability to say I'm fine calmly while a goat eats your sleeve. Experience with buckets is preferred. Experience with large buckets is essential. Benefits: free entry, endless stories at parties and the occasional chance to be sneezed on by a giraffe.

Responsibilities vary by department. Some keepers spend their mornings tossing fish to penguins who are dramatic about every single herring. Some work with lions and tigers, which involves a lot of patience, careful routines and steel doors. Some take the night shift in the reptile house, checking heat lamps and making friends with creatures that blink slowly at them. And some run the petting zoo, where the job is less science and more diplomacy between toddlers, goats and a sheep with strong opinions.

So which department would hire you? This quiz asks about your mornings, your pets, your snacks and your tolerance for being stared at, and it matches you with your future uniform. Rubber boots are provided. Dignity is not. Apply below by answering fifteen quick questions.