Which Spa Treatment Matches Your Personality?

Customer review, two stars out of five. I booked a relaxing afternoon at this spa and found it far too relaxing. I fell asleep during the massage and woke up wearing a face mask I don't remember choosing. The robe was so soft I briefly considered moving in. The tea tasted like a forest, which they said was the point. The quiet music made me emotional about a dolphin. Would complain more, but my shoulders no longer hurt. Will be back on Thursday.

Spas are funny places. Everyone walks in wearing the same fluffy robe, and yet everyone wants something completely different from the menu. Some people want an elbow pressed into their back so hard they see stars. Some want to be painted in warm mud and wrapped up like a burrito. Some want cucumbers, serums and a good mirror. And some walk straight past the treatment rooms into a wooden box heated to the temperature of a pizza oven.

Fifteen questions about stress, holidays, robes and suspicious herbal tea will match you to your treatment. Are you The Deep Tissue Warrior, The Mud Wrap Hippo, The Cucumber Facial Diva or The Sauna Stoic? Book your slot, slip on the slippers and leave your phone in the locker.